2016 Umce 18 L’Aixopluc dels Caragols, recepció, role: internet friend, Quindrop, Spain
2015 Letters to Paul Morrisey, role: Annemarie, Director: Arnand Rovira
2012 The Absence of Strangers, Al White, Reno, NV 2012
2011 Reality TV, Das perfekte Dinner 5 Day German Cooking Competition Granada Film, Köln
2010 Im Fluss des Lebens, role: Tourist, Director: Wolf Gremm, Zieglerfilm Berlin, ARD 2011
2010 Lügen haben linke Hände, role: Tourist, Director: Thomas Nennstiel, Zieglerfilm Berlin, ZDF 2011
10 years ago film acting appeared on my radar. My mind didn’t appreciate the idea, in fact, it stressed my box-thinking: maybe I would risk to be envied or judged! But something told me to go for the experience, there would be a lesson in this for me to realize…
The second little assignment I played a tourist (see szene in the photo). It was fun. The next day the production team called asking if I could work for the wardrobe department to assist the head of wardrobe. I had never done this, but am curious and like to assist when I can, so I did. The next day they called back, since little by little the film crew got sick. They needed someone to dress one of the main actors (there is a specific title for that job which I don’t recall). So I went back. Walking to the caravan, I asked the guy how far this dressing job goes, wondering if I actually need to take his clothes off and put a new costume on, like dressing a child. I was relieved when the actor told me I just need to make sure to pass him the correct clothes for the scene and possibly help him with some buttons or tie. It was fun altogether and we had some special conversations from the heart during the breaks.
The lessons: each and everyone is just as significant as someone else, from wardrobe to catering, from creating to cleaning. Not only on set. I enjoy to playfully step into different roles. It’s fun.
It’s about realizing that playing a role is not who you really are. Seems obvious, but it is not. As soon as I was booked and paid as an actress and not as an extra, I was separated from the extras, sat in a different corner, and some of the others said respectfully “oh, you are an actress”. That was quite astonishing and displayed what is going on in our world: Respect is earned for the wrong reasons.
Why would I be treated differently than the extras, wardrobe or catering just for playing the role of an actress in a movie?
It’s about playing the role and still being yourself
Not trying hard, open to accept, if invited to join some interesting project, my path led to small roles and less commercial, more artistic projects with sweet people. Not much money in that, but it felt right. I did not need to limit my experiences to either one of those job descriptions, “business woman”, “coach”, “facilitator”, “model” or “author”, but just be myself. I might never get really rich and famous in either one. For me it is not about that, it’s about being inspired and inspiring.
Express yourself, share and co operate, -create
Who are you and what are we here for. That’s the big questions. I share my personal stories because I don’t want to hold back that who I am is not a more or less accepted role I was playing. And this is just another story.
Be yourself not your story
The challenge is to keep clearing out shit (excuse the language) that has been and keeps accumulating along the way, to distinguish and realize that everything we “consume” (books, teachings, TV, contacts…) influences the picture we create of ourselves and the world or the reality the “I” perceives.
Who am I?
Just recently I witnessed some magical moments: I couldn’t sleep, got up, and started writing. Turns out, a song was coming trough me that night, with no ambition to get into music! This experience made it clear for me that nature works through me.
My living body acts like an instrument of nature, that what some people label God. God for me is the ultimate intelligence and love that created the unshakable laws of nature that we are trying to understand with science. Limitless energy, the power behind everything, love.
It’s about acting upon it, not just knowing
The goal is to live up to our potential according to the laws of nature, rather than using our power for egotistical reasons, fighting for a fancy personal goal. The chance is to evolve for a greater good, that is what really makes me happy: living in service and connectedness. That’s my current state of asking the big questions …
Love, Hari Om and lots of fun, exploring day by day
PS: If you are interested, in another healing story and the insights and experiences of living three months with Shamans in the Amazon, you might like a story I wrote, that is in the publishing process. Please shoot me an email or subscribe to receive information. Coming in September: HEADLESS CHICKEN by Ozmark Publishing